


Choke Yourself To Sleep

by darkviverna



Category: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: (no one you'll care about lol), M/M, Minor Character Death, Sith Anakin, Slightly slow burn, Timeline What Timeline, Violence, author took extreme liberties with canon, dark themes, plot heavy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-03
Updated: 2018-07-02
Packaged: 2019-06-01 14:07:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,681
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15144767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkviverna/pseuds/darkviverna
Summary: They were taught since birth, that the Fall for the Jedi is akin to death. And if Anakin Skywalker will end like this, he might as well drag Sidious down with him.





	Choke Yourself To Sleep

  If Anakin was honest with himself, and he rarely was, he would admit that he bit off a bit more than he could chew. And he could blame the Council, and Palpatine, and the Force itself all he wanted, but the truth is simple - he was in way over his head. His mind was in a fray, two opposing voices ringing in his ears, earning for peace and for destruction, and Anakin was stuck, not knowing with side to please. He earned for peace, for the feeling of holding his child in his arms, of Padme’s warmth next to his side, of Obi-Wan’s approval and the sight of his understanding - and forgiving, - smile.

  And the other voice yelled and howled, roared that he didn’t deserve that, he didn’t deserve peace, peace that would never come. Unless he accepted Palpatine’s - Darth Sidious’, - deal, unless he bent the force to his whim and forsaken death itself. And the idea itself seemed so alluring, like siren’s song that kept playing over and over in Anakin’s head. He could, oh Force, how much he wished he could just throw all of his life away to save the ones he loved, to gain power and to rise above the natural laws of the universe. 

  But in this moment, as he watched the Sith lightning dancing between Sidious’ wrinkled hands and Mace’s amethyst ‘saber, he couldn’t quite buy into what the Sith lord was selling. He didn’t want to raise his children like this, with this  _ thing _ as the emperor. And no matter how much he disliked the Council, Anakin was a Jedi - prided himself on being one of the best, though quite unorthodox. And Mace, - well, more often than not, Master was a headache, - didn’t deserve this either, no matter what the anger in his vein growled to him.

  No, it was all Sidious’ fault. The Sith started this stupid, costly war - so many dear friends lost, - and he was going to pay. The howling voice rouse higher and higher, delighted flow of the Dark side surrounded him in a mock embrace. He can end this, this stupid and devastating conflict, he can give his family and his friends the world where there is only peace and sunrises and laughter. 

  And, as he felt the Force roar around him, twisting in anticipation, chanting _ kill kill kill,  _ like a spectator in a gladiator ring, he gripped the hilt of his lightsaber until his knuckles turned white as bone. A breath in, a breath out, shuddering as he forced himself to stop trembling from the weight of his decision, Anakin turned his weapon on and lifted it above his head as he prepared to deal the fatal blow.

  Palpatine’s eyes snapped to him, wide in shock and, dare Skywalker say, fear. And it filled the Knight with gross delight that brought a twisted smirk to his lips. And the, he struck.

  For a moment, he stayed frozen as the Force around him broke into a wail, a broken and horrifying sound that tore at Anakin’s heart. It felt mourning, but surely not for the Sith that Skywalker just killed. He didn’t understand what so terrible could’ve happened to warrant such a surge of despair, until it hit him and he couldn’t help but let out a broken laugh. 

  Well. at least he took Palpatine down with him, didn’t he? Anakin stared down coldly at the corpse of someone he considered a friend, a mentor, a father figure, and could see nothing but a traitor, an enemy, a monster (he was one now, too, anyway). He turned off his ‘saber, fingers surprisingly steady, as if he didn’t just did what he did. Anakin’s mechanical hand swept across his sweaty face, clearing strands of golden curls out of his no less golden eyes. This did not go as planned at all, but where Skywalker was involved it never did, anyway.

  Anakin turned around, ready for a blow from Mace or at least a lecture, but found that the man was not standing in the room. Brows furrowed in confusion, golden eyes swept around the room until they landed on a body laying on the floor. It seems that the lighting has managed to graze the Master’s body sometime before Anakin and his strike. The newly-turned Sith could see the unsteady rise and fall of Windu’s chest, new, river-like scars crawling from underneath his tunic to his neck. 

  A new urge arouse in his throat, Dark Side whispering empty threats and promises, coaxing the Fallen Jedi into killing the unconscious man. Anakin had to grit his teeth and forcefully turn away, and still the agonizing want burned his eyelids and lungs. He needed to get out of here, before he started doing more harm than planned. The Force, a beast with black scales, red wings and yellow eyes, roared at his disobedience, but he pushed at it, and pushed, and pushed until he got it whimpering like an injured animal in the corner of his mind. He won’t let anyone else control him, not the Council, nor the republic, and certainly not the dark Side or any of its users. He is the Chosen One, and the Dark will be his tool, not the other way around.

  He walked out of the room, glancing on last time at the scene before him and giving a passing glance to the camera at the corner, can’t help but let out a small smile. ‘I will see you again,’ it said. And then, he left the scene of the crime, sneaking his way out of the Senate building and away from prying eyes.

  Anakin had to get off Coruscant, as soon as possible. There was no doubt in the fact that the jedi felt the disturbance in the Force and would rush to check out whatever happened at the Senate building. And Mace Windu’s, along with other Jedi Masters’, absence will surely raise more suspicion than needed. There were also people who expected to see Chancellor sooner or later, but they were of little concern to the newly Fallen Knight - he could deal with them without breaking a sweat, but other trained Force users would create unnecessary complications.

  He hurried down the halls, the the comforting pull the force reminding him of his objective and warning him if anyone would get too close, just in time to change direction and not bump into another living thing. Anakin could not afford any more bloodshed, not unless there was no other way. The Dark still felt new and unknown, and even though Skywalker managed to reign in it earlier, he doubted that he could stop once he gave into the sickly sweet whisperings of violence it murmured into his ear.

  Another turn, and another, a few steps and he is outside, harsh nightlights of the city-planet illuminating his path. In front of him, Anakin sees a few high-ranking, but small, space ships, that could easily get the job of getting him off Coruscant done. His golden eyes scanned the vessels as he passed them, long legs carrying him fast and certain until he stopped in front of the less luxurious, but the most functional and sturdy (to his eye) ship. The Fallen Jedi sized it up, noting its excellent condition and practical design, as well as any features that might indicate complex security mechanism.

  Not finding anything he couldn’t deal with, Anakin approached the ship, glancing at the control panel with an analyzing eye. The opening mechanism was state of the art, certainly, but Anakin prized himself on being the best in terms of technology. A few minutes pass, spent in single-minded concentration and a few moments of annoyance, and the entrance to the ship opened. Anakin hurried inside, closing the door behind him and rushing to the cockpit. 

  The captain’s seat was too excessively lavish for Anakin’s tastes, and the Fallen Knight idly wondered if Obi-Wan would prefer this kind of vessel. The thought of his old Master stinged his heart with a new ache, ‘what-if’s plaguing his already turmoiled mind, so Skywalker did his bets to push it down, down to where the Darkness was festering, like an infected wound. Now is not the time, now he has to get… somewhere.

  With silent shock, Anakin realized that he has nowhere to go. The Jedi Temple and anything else in the Order’s jurisdiction was off the table, and he couldn’t afford a trip to Naboo or any other planet he was even remotely familiar with. The Fallen Knight could just get into the open space and decide where to go from there, but the moment of weakness, suspended in the fear of the unknown, shook him down to his bones. 

  What could he do now, alone, no matter how powerful? Anakin knew he had to wipe out the rest of the Separatists, get rid of last echoes of war left in the Galaxy, but how could if he couldn’t even find a place to stay? It infuriating, to say the least, and terrifying. He felt like a coiled string, burning with tension and anger and fear, and yet so, so tired. 

  The answer, surprisingly, came from the Dark that was oozing in his mind, it’s voice layered over thousands of tones, a whisper, and a yell, and a song, all saying the same word, a name of the planet he could not quite understand. And he saw a world drenched in the Dark Side, deep in the Outer Rim, where once the Sith Empire reigned. It was not the heart the long lost Empire, but it was close, covered in dead woods, and black stone, and ruins of a civilization long lost.

  It was a perfect place to hide out. Not only no one would suspect him to retreat to some obscure Sith world, he could learn more of the Dark Side from whatever remains in the old temples and writings. Anakin punched in the coordinates in to the command panel in front of him and prepared for a long journey to the Outer Rim.

**Author's Note:**

> Work title from 'Choke' by IDKHBTFM.  
> Chapter title from 'Young Robot' by Dance Gavin Dance.  
> I'll try to update sometime soon, but I also have another work that I need to get back to xD  
> Comments are appreciated!  
> I'm @dark-viverna on tumblr


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